This is part three and the final blog from the article ‘How to Recovery from Divorce or Break up.’ To read the entire article go here. If you would like to be part of a forum dialogue about topics that matter to you including these blogs click this Group Face Book page and join us.
7. Loneliness and a supportive community
Going through a breakup means you’ve lost someone you bonded with over a long period, whether it was healthy or not. They were there to listen to you and be there for you. Now that’s gone; things are different now, maybe radically different. You’re not used to be alone, yet being alone is a part of life. Being alone happens to all of us whether we’re married or not. The loneliest person in your zip code might not be a single adult.
Many think that loneliness is a solvable problem, it’s not. It’s a normal human condition that occurs from time to time. You can feel lonely in a crowd or on a business trip or in your own home. Be aware that isolation can be your biggest enemy! Yet, realize that your aloneness can actually help you to reach out to others who care about you.
We all need relationships, even if were introverts or we have convinced ourselves that we are totally self-reliant. God knows we need each other. We’re not meant to be alone. We were created for meaningful relationships. We need to know and be known, to love and be loved. For these reasons, having a supportive community is critical to your recovery.
A community can be a faith community or group of friends or family who can support you. Make sure your supportive community knows you need their support and how you need to be supported.
8. Learn more about yourself and become a better person.
Rather than dwelling on what was done to you be open to learn from your mistakes and blind spots. Don’t just go through relationship loss, grow from it. Starting over begins with you, not the other person!
If you are to develop better relationships in the future, without repeating the same mistakes, you need to understand and examine every aspect of relationships in regard to yourself.
The Starting Over Workshop can help you discover more about yourself and how to develop meaningful relationships now and in your future. Thousands have discovered hope and deep healing by attending. You can too. It’s time to move forward, isn’t it?
9. Assuming new responsibilities.
When going through relationship loss your life may be upside down. Perhaps nothing is the same and your life is difficult now. Your loss has impacted your finances, your living environment, your social structure and your health. Everything is different now.
Perhaps there is one to take care of you now, don’t look for someone to rescue you; take responsibility for your future. It might be difficult to hear, but embrace and enjoy your singleness, don’t mourn it. This is a time to grow, not stagnate. As a single adult, seek out positive, healthy friendships that provide acceptance and help you to be a better person.
10. Take good care of yourself. Divorce or breakup recovery is a stressful, painful and life-changing process. When people are going through fundamental life changes, they must take care of themselves. Eat well, exercise and get the sleep you need. Rediscover an old hobby or activity you used to enjoy.
Reconnect with some of your old friends and associates. Invite others into your life. Don’t let the walls close in on you. Get out more often. Create new experiences. Without creating new experiences you might continue in your old negative patterns and you don’t need that. Enjoy today!
Although recovering from divorce or a breakup is not easy, you can begin again with hope and a new vibrancy for life. Do you believe your future can be better than your past? The answer to that depends on you.
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With Hope,
