To better understand the essence of self- control we need to see the connection between freedom and dignity. When we lose or damage our dignity by philosophy, someone, something or by ourselves we can feel deeply humiliated. Several humiliated and oppressed people groups have developed from centuries of human slavery to the Taliban and have left their undeniable marks on our world.
There is an old story that Abraham Lincoln went down to the slave block to buy back a slave girl. As she looked at the white man bidding on her, she figured he was another white man, going to buy her and then abuse her. He won the bid and as he was walking away with his property, he said, “Young lady, you are free.”
She said, “What does that mean?”
“It means you are free.”
“Does that mean,” she said, “that I can say whatever I want to say?”
Lincoln said, “Yes, my dear, you can say whatever you want to say.”
“Does that mean,” She said, “That I can be whatever I want to be?”
Lincoln said, “Yes, you can be whatever you want to be.”
“Does that mean I can go wherever I want to go?”
He said, “Yes, you can go wherever you want to go.”
With tears streaming down her face, she said, “Then I will go with you.”
Like this young lady we are given a choice to be free. God want s us to be free.
Like the Hebrews we don’t want to go back to Egypt do we? Like the freed lion we don’t want to be reintroduced to the cage. We want to stay free. Free from the things that kept us enslaved and stuck.
We need to be aware of the subtle temptations to cave into the things that once kept us enslaved. What are you allowing to have control over you? What desire, activity, substance or environment has a tendency to lure you into its trap? What is it you cave into? Who is it? What is it? Name it. Why can’t you say no?
Biblical self-control is not self-mastery or your strong will power. Biblical self-control is empowered by God’s spirit who wants to heighten our determination to STAY FREE!
We need to fight for our freedom by making the choices that God wants for us. Most of us have the freedom to choose many things, but some of those choices are definitely not the best for us.
You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. And even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything. 1 Corinthians 6:12
Regain or retain your freedom and dignity by making four choices
Firstly, run when you need to!
Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. 2 Timothy 2:22
Nobody is exempt from going backwards, we all have weaknesses, character defects and blind spots. Whether it’s a person, place or thing that will take you to places you will regret later you need to leave. Don’t go there. Don’t rationalize or justify, just flee.
Secondly, allow God to change your heart
The story of our lives involves our hearts. True lasting change is a work of the heart not merely an outward appearance. As Solomon said, “The heart is the well spring of life.” So much of who we are originates from our hearts, whether it’s our dreams, passion, disappointment, genuineness, love or fulfillment.
When we are deeply hurt by betrayal, abuse or deep neglect our hearts become calloused, hard, stunted, resentful and defensive. Sadly, over time our hearts begin to close. As a result we can unintentionally disengage our hearts by medicating themselves with all manner of empty trivial pursuits.
This elusive pursuit produces a kind of numbness in our hearts and we unknowingly miss out on God’s best for us. We wonder where did the joy go and we become hindered to see ourselves and others realistically. As the blind Helen Keller said, “It is better to see with you heart than to have two eyes and see nothing.”
God has so much more for you and me. He wants to change our hearts from the inside out and desires us to participate with Him by making life giving choices.
Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you. Romans 12:2
Join us next time for the two other choices.
