A British medical doctor named Ishani Kar-Purkayastha shared a story about his interaction with Doris, an 82-year-old hospital patient. Two days before Christmas, Doris seemed healthy and ready for discharge. But for some reason she kept complaining about inexplicable health issues.
Dr. Kar-Purkayastha wrote: “Yesterday it was her arm that was hurting, before that her hip. Truth is, Doris is an incredibly healthy 82-year-old, and we can’t find anything. I have no doubt that it will be the same today.”
When the X-rays came back normal, he told Doris that he would have to stick to the plan of sending her home. Doris looked down at the floor and quietly said, “I don’t want to go home at Christmas …. It’s just that I’m all alone and there are so many hours in the day.”
Then after a long pause, she sighed and asked, “Doctor, can you give me a cure for loneliness?
The Christmas season can be depressing if you are alone or dispirited and everyone else seems overly joyous and happy. Many have no friends or family nearby, have recently gone through or are going through divorce or experiencing the loss of a loved one. Others have no gifts to give or receive. Others feel disconnected or estranged from their families and perhaps even from the people around them.
Family ties, like friendships, are often imperfect. People tend to disappoint each other, especially when expectations run as high as they do at this time of year. And what appears enviable on the outside may not be as appealing if you were able to peel off the layers and peek inside many families.
Keep things in perspective. The decorations will come down, stores will soon start preparing for President’s Day, and it will be back to business as usual before you know it. While most advice can’t take away pain, if you’re feeling down, I hope these few suggestions might help you over the holiday hump:
Lighten Up and De- Clutter
Get rid of things you don’t need that might be “gifts” (clothes and household objects you no longer use or need) to others and give it away to a church, Goodwill , or the Salvation Army.
Attend a church service with an expectant heart
You’re not the only one experiencing pain, loneliness, or grief during the holidays, Millions of others are to. You can google the term “Blue Christmas Services” to see if any are being held in your community. Regardless if it’s your church or not just go. God desires to speak to you and remind YOU that you deeply matter to Him, that He is Emmanuel – God With YOU.
Volunteer somewhere
Check into opportunities in your community to help people who are worse off than you. Give of yourself to someone somewhere. Get out and engage yourself somewhere in your local community. Maybe being a Salvation bell ringer or volunteering at a soup kitchen or wherever it may be.
Compose a gratitude list
Write a gratitude list that includes at least ten things and share it with someone. Put it on Face Book and your local media websites. You’ll get the double benefit: Realizing you have things to be grateful for and making someone else’s day when they see your attitude of gratitude.
Go see a good movie
Take yourself out to the year’s Big Movie on Christmas or New Year’s Day. Go see the remarkable true story ‘Unbroken.’ Don’t feel self-conscious about going by yourself. Enjoy. Go with God. Once the movie is over, turn to the person next to you and make a positive remark. It’s nice to connect with someone over a shared experience.
Read a good book
You’re never alone when reading. Pick out a new book or a cherished favorite at your library or local bookstore. Brew a cup of your favorite beverage and set aside some hours to get lost in a good story. Try Eric Metaxas’ New York Times best seller Miracles.
Find someone else who will be alone, too.
Craving company? Surely, there’s a colleague at work or neighbor who is likely to be spending time alone too. Perhaps you could plan to do something together.
Maybe you aren’t the one feeling blue over the holidays but know someone else who is likely to be feeling that way, be real, but be sensitive and don’t overdo the merriment and good cheer.Figure out which friends, relatives, or neighbors you can help and what you can do. Sometimes even a “Hi, I’m thinking of you” phone call reminds someone they aren’t alone and are being thought about. It may be all they need to get over this holiday hump.
You’re in good company. Jesus also knew what it was like to be alone as well. He understands.
Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. “Couldn’t you men keep watch with me for one hour?…Cast your cares upon Him, for He cares for you… For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses…Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you. Matthew 27:40; I Peter 5:7; Hebrews 4:15; 13:5
