In the last blog we looked at how the emotional and mental consequences of our words can be liberating or can distance us from others. Our words can bring healing or a curse. All of us can improve upon the words we choose. We can prevent problems before they happen by using wise words. Being reminded of four dynamics about the power of our words can change things and prevent broken relationships.
First, talking too much can get us into deep trouble.
Countless people have said way too much too often and have alienated themselves from others. Solomon had some good advice about our words, “Do not be quick with your mouth, and do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few. Much dreaming and many words are meaningless.” Ecclesiastes 5:2, 7
God desires to help us control ourselves when we open our mouths. If you a have tendency to talk too much, think again. Maybe Calvin Coolidge had Proverbs 10:19 in mind when he said, “I have noticed that the nothing I’ve said did not harm me.”
In a multitude of words sin is not absent, but he who refrains his lips is wise. Prov.10:19
Talk less, listen more.
Secondly, angry words can push people away from us.
Reckless words pierce like a sword. Pro.12:18
Despite our rationalization of how, why and what we have said we need to be careful what we say. None of us are exempt from blowing it. Angry and vindictive words, gossip or sharing confidential information have permanently ruined relationships and have cost people their jobs.
An angry person stirs up conflict, and a hot-tempered person commits many sins. Prov. 29:21-23
He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends. Prov.17:9 See Prov.16:28; 26:22; Ecc.7:21-22
Thirdly, our wise words can influence others for good.
The lips of the righteous nourish man… From the fruit of his lips a man is filled with good things as surely as the work of his hands rewards him. Prov. 10:21; 12:14
Fourthly, our words affect our future. Mere words can never substitute for deeds. Some use words all their life without real change. We’re not talking about vocabulary or techniques, but getting control of our hearts. For out of our heart the mouth speaks…God help us.
Our words do matter; they have the power of life or death. Set a guard over my mouth, O LORD; keep watch over the door of my lips Psalm 141:3. Our words can contribute to a solution or further the difficulty. The Apostle Paul encouraged us to speak with grace and consideration, “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” Colossians 4:6
If you want win the war of words it will involve choosing your words CAREFULLY. You and I need to define the art of listening and being slow to speak. It’s not just about the words you speak, but about the words you choose not to speak. Is what you’re about to say true, confidential, kind, or necessary?
Here are some very impacting words from the Apostle Paul that we all would do well to practice,
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. Ephesians 4:29
Which of the 4 dynamics resonated with you the most and why? Your comments are encouraged and appreciated.
Mark
