By Mark Skalberg & DiAnna Steele
Thanks for all your input about pet peeves related to waiting. It appears one of the biggest frustrations with waiting is how long things seem to take.
How long is too long to wait for a promotion, for recognition, for a plane, for a relationship, for the light to turn green on our evening commute?
Whether we recognize it or not, waiting is a constant in our lives. At any given moment we’re all waiting for something or someone. Waiting patiently is hard, especially in a culture with a microwave mentality. We demand immediacy, in everything from meals to work to traffic to relationships. We want what we want and we want it yesterday. In this climate of instant gratification, we can easily feel as if we’ve been waiting forever for something, even if it’s only been a short time.
A common lament among singles, related to waiting goes something like this: “I’ve been single {insert # here} years. At this rate, I’ll probably never get married.” Years tick away and patience dwindles, even disappears. In frustration, singles often settle for any relationship rather waiting for a more suitable life partner.
Tolstoy said, “The strongest of all warriors are these two-Time and Patience.” Yet so often we give away our strength in favor of immediacy.
Perhaps instead of asking “How long should we wait”, the more important question is, “Can we wait?” Or more specifically, “What happens if we don’t wait?”
Looking back on our lives we probably recall some dreams or goals we wish we’d waited a bit longer on rather than quit. Maybe it was an educational pursuit, maybe a diet or a plan for improving our health, maybe a relationship. We may even ask ourselves, “Why did I cash in so easily? Why did I punt on second down? Why?”
The obvious answer? Quitting appears much easier than enduring. It’s easier not to study, easier not to exercise, easier to leave a job than to resolve conflict, easier to walk away from a relationship than deal with tough issues.
But unwillingness to wait it out yields life-long, as well as undesirable and distressing, consequences. That educational pursuit we gave up on might one day cost us a promotion & a significant pay increase. The diet we couldn’t hang with may result in serious health repercussions down the road.
The relationship we walked away from when things got tough might have been the very catalyst God wanted to use to grow us into His image, but instead we remain stuck throughout adulthood, possibly even lonely and isolated.
The truth is quitting is easier in the short-term but failure to wait things out often results in more painful long-term consequences.
Our third consideration, then, is How do we wait well?
Sticking it out requires something of us. That something is endurance, the willingness and determination to keep persevering when odds appear stacked against us.
Norwegians say, “Heroism consists in hanging on one minute longer.” We build endurance one minute at a time.
We must also keep in mind waiting is Active, not passive. In the process of waiting on our dreams, we are intentionally involved in making them a reality. We engage with life, continually moving forward even as we wait.
Thomas Edison, who performed more than a thousand experiments for his many inventions, would say after a failed experiment, “I have discovered one more way how not to do it.”
Abraham Lincoln was defeated 8 times for public office before his election to President of theUnited States.
Nelson Mandela suffered gross injustices for 30+ years before the annihilation of Apartheid.
Noah Webster crossed theAtlantictwice to personally insure accuracy in his dictionary.
Yet, do we see endurance modeled today in our culture? In some ways quitting equates with glamour. Daily tabloids thrive on stories of personal failure and abandonment. Hollywood romanticizes quitting—can you hear the epic music playing in the background as Rhett Butler walks out on Scarlett with his famous line, “Frankly my dear…”?
Though Tinsel Town costumes have evolved, the throw in the towel mentality persists. The Beautiful People quit relationships as easily as they quit rehab while the Little People applaud them for being honest about their feelings and brave in their conduct, aspiring to be just like them.
Modern society wastes the spotlight on those who easily abandon ship. Better to shine it on those who don’t, from Churchill’s WWII rallying cry for the Brits of “never give up, never, never, never give up” to Nelson Mandela’s endurance of 30+ years for Apartheid’s dismantling, and his eventual Presidency.
Our endurance might not get us elected to public office. Nor will it make headlines. It probably won’t even render pats on the back. Yet, endurance leaves a legacy. Even better, God rewards endurance.
“As you know, we consider blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about.” James 5:11
So how’s your endurance? You want to give up on ______? People frequently say, “You don’t know my situation. I have no other choice.” Sure, life can be extremely difficult at times and you want to turn your back on something or someone. We all feel that way sometimes. Don’t cash it in. Not yet! Instead, rely on God for your strength.
“God gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.” Isaiah40:29
Rest assured God is BIGGER than any problem you have. God DOES reward you when you persevere.
“Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.” James 1:12
In our next blog we’ll take a look at practical ways to build endurance.
DiAnna Steele is a Christian Writer & Speaker living in Colorado Springs. She offers a seminar for women entitled, “Ladies in Waiting & Weighting & Wading”. You may reach her at www.diannasteele.com
